its completely up to us

This week the trend was to crash and burn and then return again to practice the life that I pretend provides enough to get me through the weekend. I know that I don't want to die sitting around watching my life go by and what we take from this is what we'll get and we haven't quite figured it out just yet because all of us are all too stuck. Ttrapped to a chair watching our lives blow up

stuck watching our lives blow up.

you gave me a solution, what have I done with it?

cause I was absolutely sure I had it all figured out way back then, but after this day it's this week all over again.

And lately the weather, has been so Bi-polar and Consequently so have I.

Our concentration it contains a deadly flaw, change from words to blah, blah blah. We took prescription drugs but look how much good that did. Well I think I had a point, but I just got distracted

Lately it just seems to me like we've got the letters A.D.D. branded into our mentality we simply can't focus on anything.

That one thing of the moment that we all happen to like will only very temporarily kinda break the cycle of the double edged sword of being lazy and being bored. We just want more and more and more till it's all we can afford

To keep our eyes open for just one more day

To keep on hoping that we'll stumble on a way

To keep our minds open for just one more day

cause its completely up to us to maintain consciousness

well no one can possibly listen to this

more than 4 reps is just monotonous

we're losing interest, losing interest, losing interest 

cause its completely up to us to maintain consciousness

-Shamozzle of Relient K

if I could leave this goldfish sea...

This is for you.
Not in a broad, second-person-to-direct-it-at-the-reader-bullshit way.
In a -if-I-was-an-auctioneer-I'd-call-you-'in the back row with the cool hair and cool shoes, with the waistcoat. No not you David Tennant, the short one. No, not you Paul McDermott, the other short one. With the glasses and the cap and the talent, yeah you there' kind of way.

You are the one I will call when I have decided to give into the urges and drive on the wrong side of the road for a while, when I'm about to give up and call my boss a law- breaking heartless idiotic douchebag of a wog.
You are the one I'll call at three in the morning when I've just got to drive a very, very, very long way away down long dark winding highways.
You are the one I will call when I have lost it and don't want to find it for a while.

You are the one I will call when I just can't be normal anymore, when I can't spend my weekends sitting in front of the TV and doing homework, or not doing homework as is more often true.
Not because I think you're crazy, but because you're a rebel at heart, you're like my mentor for rebellious scandalosity. And yes, I just made up a word. (Are you proud flattered weirded out yet?)
I'll call you because you won't try to stop me, but you will take lots of hilarious pictures, and write on things with sharpie with me, and you'll have my back.

I will never forget when you shot down that flamer for me. It was amazing, and it was then that I knew you cared about me, in whatever weird way suits you.

So, I thought I'd let you know that these temptations are building up heavy right now, I nearly drove the whole way home last night on the right (e.g. wrong) side of the road, like, very very close to actually doing it...


am I going nuts?