i miss you so much.
like, so so so so bad.
Ive tried to see you again and again and again, but youve been away enjoying greener pastures and I am left here wondering why you dont pick up the phone and getting silly with paranoia that maybe you dont want to see me.
Now you do, now your getting off your arse to organise something and I'll be stuck roughing it in the coorong, bored stiff, missing you some more and wishing i was at your place swimming instead of getting sunburnt doing nothing.
and i keep thinking stupid things like 'i guess i wont see him til the first day of school'.
And thats exactly the point.
I wont see you until then, or then, or even close after then.
Because your bad study habits tore you away from me and I couldnt stop them.
I'm going to cry. I know I am. At school.
I never ever cry at school...
cos I always have to bottle it back up again to go to class and I hate doing that, its much more worserer than just letting it pour itself out...
I feel like I've failed you.
People keep telling me that that's silly, that I'm a great friend for you, that I do you good.
Its obviously not been enough.
I would have done almost anything, you know that?
Almost anything to keep you there with me.
Where I could look after you some more, and you me.
I feel like I was supposed to help you pull your finger out and stop spiralling.
Therefore, I feel that I have failed...
just tell me you miss me ok?
and mean it, if its not too much to ask...
The Shade In The Night
4 weeks ago