i owe you an apology.
im sorry that i have tried to pin this stuff on you.
As much as I think I would like to be able to blame you, I can't.
Im sorry that I let your little jokes get under my skin, I know you don't want to hurt me.
I'm sorry that I...that I based my security on your opinion of me.
That was dumb.
I should explain a little bit more.
I have this bad habit of getting my security from other people, particularly guys. Boyfriend guys... And even though I don't feel that way about you anymore and its been quite some time, I guess that little bit of it carried over to you as my friend, I shouldnt have let it. I shouldnt have let it exist at all.
I said that I needed to learn to stand on my own feet.
Maybe for a while i did know how, but i forgot...
im sorry that ive been so touchy, it must have been annoying lol.
I want you to know that as of now, I am starting to try and undo it...To stand up on my own again...well, stand up with god.
No hard feelings, I'm sorry that i got so upset at you, even though to a much lesser degree it was deserved. I think i had a right to be a bit annoyed, but not shattered like I ended up.
See you at school...
The Shade In The Night
4 weeks ago