I keep getting 'Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas' stuck in my head.
There is something so desperately sad about that hopefulness.
Does that make sense?
That line that I put in the title always gets me, because the heartbroken pessimist living in my mind wordlessly cries out without fail, 'no they won't' and it just...brings me to weeping. That song is the broken hearted Christmas carol, calling out to all humanity to 'let your heart be light '. Just, just let go of it.
That song is Carol sitting in her lounge room on christmas eve curled up tight like she'll fall out of her own chest if she lets go, listening to a playlist on her iPod
And Carol, she gets up. She pries her hands from her knees and her chin from her knees and her knees from her chest and she does not fall out of herself. Something incredible happens. The pain falls out instead.
She picks herself up and goes to a carols service, and to family christmas. She lets her heart be light.
Please forgive my chronic sentimentality and punism, I have been watching Grey's Anatomy.
And I have one last bit, that I wrote as my facebook status, stands alone really but I wanted to put it up here cos I really like it.
'Human life is incredible, there is an unbelievably strange mix of hope, joy, agony and desperation in the idea of waiting for an organ donation and Silent Night and O Holy Night are possibly the most beautiful songs in the world done right.'
The Holding Of One's Breath
9 hours ago